Month Sixty-Six

SculptureDear Husband,

Sometimes I wonder if you could possibly go 48 hours without spending money. I mean there’s always something that you’ve found or you want to do, or that you need or that would be great for something else. I swear you con me into things by giving me the impression that the initial cost will be the final one or that the better version of the first option will be the best decision in the long run.

I think this is why we just dropped almost a grand on six Bluetooth speakers that we don’t need. I know that they were mispriced by Hardly Normal so they were kind of a steal anyway. I also know that the sales guy told you that he’d be buying them and flogging them on ebay if he had the time which was precisely the reason you wanted to buy them in the first place but still…for a while you have wanted to replace the one Bluetooth speaker that Genibean busted. And we started looking at things closer to the $100 mark (which it is now obvious you had no intention of buying) and this month we have six speakers that retail at over $300 each. You better be right that you can flog them on ebay for a profit.

It will probably endear me to you a little more after the advent of my new phone. I finally got one! Yay. After practically throwing my last one in the toilet 6 months into a 24 month contract, I have been patiently waiting and paying off my debt before finally getting something new. As soon as I was just about to purchase one though, you suddenly wanted one too! The negotiation for my setup became what about if we got two? The new phone is way better than your current one apparently and we’d be saving money in the long run by buying it now and your life would obviously be so much better if we replaced something that worked perfectly.

Now I get that you’d like a shiny new toy. I do. But I could have done without the pouting and the pissedness you exhibited when I said I didn’t want us to buy you one; when I pointed out that when you broke your previous phone beyond use, we bought you a current model as a replacement. We didn’t repair an existing phone or make use of a handset we already possessed. We got you one that was practically new. Granted, it wasn’t brand new in box and it wasn’t equal in value to the one we purchased outright for me but it wasn’t like we bought you a cheap arse burner phone to tide you over either. You got a phone you enjoyed using. I had been waiting 18 months to finally get that chance to have a phone that I wanted and it really felt like you were trying to steal my thunder dude. Not cool.

The other thing that is hard is that I am trying to get back into exercise again and it doesn’t really feel like you’re that supportive. I mean I don’t think you are against it or that you are being specifically unsupportive but it feels like I’m inconveniencing you by going out walking at night. When dinner is done and Genibean is snuggled up in bed, it is still somehow a notable irritation that I am not physically going to be in the house sitting on my arse watching TV. Which is probably what I would be doing if I wasn’t walking.

It’s not even as if the old deal is still in place where if I walk the dog, you do the dishes. No, I’m still doing those too. I don’t actually mind. This is not a woe is me, I think you should be doing the dishes cause I have too much to do around the house. I think it would be nice though if there was a little more encouragement cause its hard to get going again, you know? Or maybe just a little less oh, are you going to walk Reuben again tonight? Which tends to make me think you meant why do you need to walk him again, you did that yesterday? Just to clarify, I know that this is not what you mean or what you are thinking but…impressions, yeah?

So maybe this month will be the beginning of me getting back to pre-wedding which is even better than pre-baby. I’m sceptical of course but hey, I’ll give it a go. Maybe this month could also be the beginning of the next period of study for you though. You applied for uni this month as a mature age student. You will have to wait and see if you get in of course but I think it is a practical step towards changing the direction of your career. You have not been enjoying that part of your life at all for a while now but its familiar and routine which sometimes dulls the desire for something else. If you’re ready to try and make some things happen though, that’s great. Making family work with everything else may be a challenge but if it’s important, we’ll figure it out.

Semi-athletically yours,

Your Loving Wife

* Photo taken at last years Sculptures By The Sea

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