Now I Have Dog Beer!

Dear Husband,

Do you recall when I mentioned how not to train your puppy? You know, by clouding the lines of pack leadership or by rewarding questionable behaviour because it was cute? Yeah, well on the weekend, I think you confused the poor boy again. I know that it was hot outside in the sun and I know that his water bowl was inside where he couldn’t get to it. I also know that you were trying to be the responsible dog owner by making sure that your pup was not suffering unduly in the heat by offering him what water you had personally, but seriously? Out of your own glass? I think that’s slightly more ridiculous than responsible.

And as you will recall, I told you at the time that I felt this was sending the wrong message. I also told you that I thought you were setting a dangerous precedent because you had just effectively taught him that he is allowed to have whatever is in a glass. We already have to watch like a hawk any food that we put down on a surface under 1.5 metres in height because he’s cheeky. Now we’re going to have to start watching our drinks as well! I will tell you however that I did feel slightly vindicated (and decidedly unsympathetic) when about 24 hours after the aforementioned drinking out of the glass incident, I heard you wail from the living room “Now I have dog beer!”.

See, that’s what happens when you teach your four-legged friend that he is allowed to drink out of your glass. He assumes that it is a blanket allowance that means he is permitted to have whatever is in your glass, whenever he can get to your glass. And if your glass just happens to have a beer that you have been waiting all day to have in it, well then beer is what he is going to drink. I do find it amusing that he actually appears to like beer though. You said he got a couple of laps in before he lifted his head and cocked it to one side to consider the new beverage that wasn’t either water or milk and then decided to go in for more just as you figured out what was happening and removed your drink accordingly.

You seemed very upset by the fact that he had sampled your beer as though it was now contaminated and was a wasted glass. I thought that was a bit over dramatic because you took a nap and spooned with the dog earlier in the day and you let him “kiss” you regularly so I can’t really see the difference between that and him having stuck his tongue in your beer. When I told you that you should just drink the beer anyway and get over it, you assured me that you were definitely still going to drink your glass of beer like that wasn’t even the issue. You were just a little miffed that he got to it first.

As I said, unsympathetically yours,

Your Loving Wife

* Photo taken at Hanging Rock Winery


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