The Well Of Lost Socks

Dear Husband,

The Well Of Lost Socks is growing. Somewhat dramatically it would seem. I just thought you should know. In fact, I was wondering if you could explain it…because it seems to be full of your socks…

As you may or not be aware (because after all, washing the clothes is one of “my jobs”), I keep a shopping bag handy in the laundry to house any and all of the lonely socks that result from my loads of washing. I place all of the solitary socks in this bag rather than putting them back in the relevant sock drawers as I am ever hopeful that the matching mate will show up in a future load of washing. Each time I find a seemingly forsaken foot covering, I check to see if its partner has already found its way into this bag and I can reunite them and return them to their rightful place – usually your sock drawer which perpetually stands open for some reason. As has more often than not been the case recently however, more isolated items of your attire have been going in than pairs have been coming out. Out of the bag that has been named The Well Of Lost Socks.

Just so as you know, every time I gather the washing, I do try to find pairs of socks. Especially your socks. Sometimes this is not easy to do however as you tend to take off your socks all over the house, occasionally when you’re on your way from room to room and then you just leave them. There are also always a number socks that can be found amongst your floordrobe however as this pile of clothes and shoes usually gets rifled through several times before it gets to washing day, part of a pair may easily go walkabout. I am always hopeful that the other half will just show up in a future load of washing though but as I have recently noted, this seems to be happening less and less.

After doing almost all of the washing that I could find on the weekend, I was dismayed to see that the Well Of Lost Socks is markedly fuller than it was several months ago. The ratio of your socks to mine is also about 10:1. And seeing as my sock is one of a pair of sports sock that was last worn by you in error, its almost like it is your sock as well. So I was just curious as to whether you could explain the disappearance of so many of your socks. Do you throw them away? Do you hide them? I’m pretty sure the puppy is not disintegrating them without my knowledge as he habitually leaves your socks alone when they are laying on the floor in the living area. Maybe the washing machine eats them although I find it strange that it doesn’t take more of mine should this be the case. I honestly don’t know what happens to your socks, I just know that it’d be nice if there weren’t so many of them that seem to disappear into thin air.

Perplexedly yours,

Your Loving Wife

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