Dear (hypothetical) Button,
If you’re not in fact hypothetical right at this point of time then I probably owe you an apology. You see, I buy the stationery and general amenities for my work at the moment. Now “stationery” is pretty obvious and boring (except when I buy something a little bit pretty like my diary or coloured pens) but “amenities” covers a wide range of things including milk and beer. Which we definitely do not imbibe together. Yuk, what a horrible thought. Anyway, since I buy all the amenities, I therefore am also the one in charge of catering for events. I am getting to the point, I promise. So last week, we had a final BBQ and I got things like salad and kebabs and dips and chips and…soft cheese. And then I ate the soft cheese. Which is not a crime I know, however, so close to the time when I will know if you are or if you aren’t, I shouldn’t have bought it. Actually, I just shouldn’t have eaten it but its very hard to resist so I just shouldn’t have bought it. Especially since there was a very pregnant woman at this BBQ also. But she ate it of her own free will so I don’t feel so bad now.
But then after the BBQ, it got worse because after the BBQ, on the Friday, there were only two of us in the office. And then it got to beer-o-clock and since I don’t drink beer, I had to drink something else. Which I bought right before drinking it. It wasn’t as if there was a lonely bottle of tart fuel Lemon Ruski in the fridge and I had to put it out of its misery. No. There wasn’t anything in the fridge I would consider drinking right then so I went out and bought something. And then when my colleague and I had finished half of the 4 pack between us, there really was a lonely Lemon Ruski each left in the fridge so we had those too. So yeah, probably should have thought that one through a little more…
So if you ever get those moments like Gigi where you’re feeling a little “drain bamaged”…then maybe that has absolutely nothing to do with me but I should probably remember to be a little more careful. Hopefully it’ll easier if I ever know I need to be good rather than thinking I should hold back indefinitely just in case. And when I say hold back, I don’t mean be a Nazi about my diet or anything (obviously) but I will try to be what is widely recognised by multiple medical practitioners as “healthy”. Rethink your 2nd drink! Just kidding. I have a feeling however that if I do end up having a real reason to take a more strict approach to my diet then it is going to be a bit of a learning process. So much to remember…with reduced brain capacity because clearly the navel-gazing would become a little more intense. I’ll probably continually stuff it up but at least I’m remembering to try.
* I would credit the image if I had the faintest idea of who owned it.